European Commission - Silly

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter. n the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.

Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer peple wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v". During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensi bl riten styl.

 Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru. Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas. If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl.

Definitely NOT true, but it is pretty funny!

I Think, Therefore I Can Not Sleep and The Cure for Insomnia

As I flicked channels on my TV last night a CNN Special about an amazing new discovery caught my attention.

After millions and millions of dollars spent and many hours of intensive research trying to figure out some sort of chemical combination that would bring the sleep back to sleepless people the Cure for Insomnia has finally been found.

Surprisingly the Cure for Insomnia was not found by any of those pharmaceutical labs, it was actually found by a woman in Canada (women do kick butts!).

Even more surprising is that the woman was NOT trying to find the Cure for Insomnia and she does NOT even have a chemical or pharmaceutical background.

Her discovery is much better than any pill, capsule or even suppository could be, as it is covered by all health plans available. Contrary to many new pharmaceutical advancements that are only partially covered, if covered.

Also contrary to some of the previous advancements it does not work for a specific amount of time, such as 4, 6 or 8 hours. It does not need a second dose after the initial dose. All you need is ONE.

Unfortunately, the Cure is not readily available on the market, it will take some good nine months after you place your order to actually get it.

Her discovery is guaranteed to cure any type of insomnia, even chronic cases.

The cure, my friends, is to have kids!

Side Effects: may cause addiction and costs quite a bit of money, not necessarily right away, but long term.